Unhappiness

Today was miserable. I have never felt this miserable during an outing. With my friends. And God knows an open blog (which of course is quite hidden) isn’t the best channel to express my frustrations, but it is probably the most cathartic experience. If one of them is reading this, do it with an open mind. It’s not going to be pleasant reading

Rushing to finish the research stuff at 330am when we were meeting at 730am was probably a bad start. And it got worse.

Breakfast was dim sum at this Chinese restaurant. It looked respectable, but fuck me the food was terrible. Dim sum restaurants are supposed to be fantastic experiences, but maybe it’s because since I was young dim sum with the extended family was always at top quality restaurants (Jumbo, Crystal Jade, Wah Lok etc) so that molded and shaped my view. Regardless, no self-respecting restaurant serves har kow that falls apart or puts pieces of radish with the prawns, or a cheap mooncake paste in banana pastry, or…this would take forever if I listed out all the faults with the food so lets continue.

(Side note: Ever since I took an obsessive keen interest in food, one of my biggest disagreements with family, relatives and friends has always been about seasoning. From how I see it, food needs to be heavily seasoned in order to taste good, WHICH IS WHY YOU NEED MORE DARK SOYA SAUCE FOR A GOLDEN MUSHROOM STIR FRY. Ok I needed to get that out of my system ARGH. Anyhow, it just strikes me as something quite peculiar that my aunts were so insistent that they never used MSG in their cooking, which makes their dishes horrendously underseasoned and bland, or how my mum/friends are so worried about the “burnt” bits.)

I think the most frustrating thing about the trip is the conversations. Good Lord hearing young men talk about watches and shoes and t-shirts at length and with such self-importance is annoying. And this already dreadful thing is exacerbated by hearing how some of their other schoolmates are immature, childish and always “chasing money” to quote them. “You can dress a pig up in a suit, but you can’t stop it from grunting” As far as I recall, I don’t think I am snobbish or picky about conversations. I enjoyed the deeper discussions with YX and Jon over topics like racism and ethics as much as the conversations about movies and university life with K and KS. But I guess the obsession people have with the fashion industry is something that will always irk me, partially because during my most formative years the idols/media figures/academics/chefs that influenced me the most, along with what I actually absorbed from my parents, were never too concerned about fashion and most actually criticized it. (George Carlin and Marco Pierre White, amongst others) Then again, perhaps my willingness to spend freely on food is as puzzling to those who spend freely on clothes?

I might have more points to make, but I cant really recall/ too tired to continue. Anyhow, this has been REALLY cathartic…WOW.

I don’t know (Think I’m going to steal this perfect way to end from Grace Helbig)